Thursday, April 1, 2010

Hunters: Smoke Mountain

This is my response to my book. It's a fictional story response to Seekers: Smoke Mountain, written in the hunters' point of view.


Daniel collapsed into a chair, laughing as world around him spun, oblivious to the storm outside the cabin in the excitement of the party his friends had thrown. A beer bottle, knock out of his hand by his impact in the chair, fell to the floor with a loud clink, and rolled away, a crack forming in the glass. Daniel’s head lolled back on the top of the chair, and he looked up at the wall behind him.

The window was fogged up from the chill of the rain outside, making it almost impossible for Daniel to see anything through the rain or the water streaming from the roof. Of course, he wouldn’t be able to see anything anyway, as the storm outside blocked the moonlight, making the nighttime forest pitch black. A deer head hanging above the window had been vandalized sometime during the night, toilet paper strewn about it’s horns and covering its face. Next to it, the head of a moose had been used for beer bottle disposal. It’s horns had been filled with empty bottles and bottle caps were stuffed in its mouth. Daniel turned his head.

He looked up at the wall next to him and saw with some difficulty, the head of a grizzly bear, illuminated from below by the light in the fireplace. Of the three animals hanging on the wall, this was the only one not to be vandalized. Its glass eyes still stared uninterrupted into space, and its snarling mouth was still empty. Maybe no one had wanted to mess with it, or maybe it was just too high up for anyone to do anything about it. Either way, the only thing on top of the bear’s head was dust.

Daniel pondered as to why the bear seemed the only thing in the violently spinning room not affected by the celebration-rather sluggishly, as he was still drunk-and suddenly found his answer. As he stared at the shaggy brown head, his vision blurred and distorted it until it resembled, what seemed to Daniel, something along the lines of a clown, but funnier looking. The firelight below, which had made the bear look almost haunted before, now added to the amusement, and seemed more like splattered face paint. Suddenly the was a crash and a yell from the other side of the room and Daniel’s head whipped around as he sprang from his chair in surprise.

The bottle he’d dropped had rolled steadily across the floor, between the feet of the other three hunters tromping drunkenly around the cabin, and come to a stop a few feet from one of the staggering men. This hunter was a big man with a Texas accent, and he was always convinced he was right, so it wasn’t a surprise that he was in a heated argument with one of Daniel’s other friends when he stepped on the bottle, flipped into the air, and landed on his back. All within the two minutes that Daniel had been staring at the wall.

Daniel rushed over as best he could to see if his buddy-he forgot his real name, but everyone called him Tex, as he remembered-needed help, but in the moments it took Daniel to reach him, Tex had pulled himself up, staggered over to the man he’d been arguing with-Daniel was certain his name was Rick-and started shouting at him, jabbing his finger into his chest every time he said ‘you’.

“You did this! You sabotaged me! Trying to get ridda ol’ Tex are ya?! Jus ‘cause you can’t admit that ah’m right!” Rick didn’t like that at all.

“You liar! I shot that bear fair and square! Tell ‘im, Dan!”, Rick snapped. Daniel stared at Rick in confusion, unable to recall what the heck he was talking about. Then he remembered. It was the reason for the party; the catch of the biggest grizzly bear they’d ever seen. They’d been tracking it through the mountains for days when both Tex and Rick had shot at the beast that morning. One of them had apparently hit the grizzly and the four hunters rejoiced. They’d driven all day to get back to the cabin, and thrown the party the minute they’d walked in the door.

Daniel was pulled back to the present as the fourth member of the party, Dave, spoke up, saying, “Well, maybe you both hit the bear.”

Dave couldn’t have opened up a bigger opportunity for the fight to get worse. As soon as the words had left his mouth, Tex stated that they both couldn't have hit the bear because Rick couldn't even hit the ground if he was aiming at it. Rick responded by punching Tex in the nose mid-sentence. Daniel stepped between the two men. There was nothing he hated more than two friends getting into a fight.

"Come on, guys. Is it really worth getting into a fight over?", Daniel asked as Rick and Tex glared knives at each other from either side of him. Daniel looked to Dave for help. Dave, who looked as worried as he did, didn't know what to do. Daniel looked around the room for something that would help him and spied the grizzly bear head on the wall. It didn't look like a clown anymore. Now it looked like a demon jeering at him as his friends got ready to push him aside and kill each other.

Suddenly, a great howling roar came from outside the cabin door. Daniel stared at the door before slowly turning to look at his three companions. Tex and Rick had stopped trying to push past him and were both staring at the door, trying to figure out what would have made that noise and whether they should try to shoot it, leave it alone, or get in the truck and leave right away. Dave had jumped like a scared cat at the noise outside the door. Unlike a cat, Dave had landed on his back on the hard wood floor.

For a few seconds, they all stayed like that, then Tex and Rick both made up their minds, and ran to get their guns, pushing Daniel over in the process. Dave jumped to his feet, hobbled over to the window, looked out, then tripped over his own feet as he rushed to get his gun, yelling, "Four bears! There're four bears right outside!" Daniel didn't need to hear anymore. He got to his feet, which was easier than before, as the room seem a lot steadier than before, and ran outside as Dave handed him his gun. Sure enough, He could barely make out the forms of the four bears retreating into the woods.

Dave ran past him toward the truck as Daniel jumped down the few stairs leading to the cabin's door, took aim at the biggest of the bears and fired. There was a bang and a splintering of wood. Daniel cursed as he realized that he'd missed and hit a small sapling a few yards away. Daniel ran up beside Rick and Tex, who were firing into the trees as if they were in the middle of a war zone, and lifted his gun back up to take aim again, but the bears were no longer in range. In fact, they weren't even within sight anymore, thanks to the rain and the blackness of the night.

There was a rumble and suddenly Daniel was blinded by the bright lights of the truck. Dave had started it up and Rick and Tex were already inside, ready to get back on the bears' trail.

"C'mon, Dan! The bears aren't gonna wait fer ya!", Tex yelled. Daniel ran to the truck and jumped in as Dave started the car forward in pursuit of the four bears. Daniel gripped his seat regretting his deciding to get in the car as Dave cranked the wheel to the side, sending the truck sliding in the mud, and Daniel into Tex, as he tried to avoid hitting an old oak tree.

"Are you sure it's a good idea to be driving in this weather?", Daniel shouted to Dave as the truck lurched nauseatingly down a muddy slope, bumping over a log along the way. Daniel was almost positive his stomach was still at the cabin.

Rick turned around in his seat and said, "Quit worryin' and enjoy the ride!" Daniel wasn't sure that was possible. He thought for a moment, then sat down to wait for the nightmarish ride to end, hopefully with the group taking home a few bears. After an hour had passed, Dave stopped the truck saying, "We'd better head home. We can head out again tomorrow."

"What?", Tex said asked astonished. "But we're so close! Ah bet that we'd catch 'em in a few minutes if we hadn't stopped!"

"We can't go any farther anyway. Look for yourself." Dave pointed into the darkness. Rick, Daniel, and Tex pressed up against the windows to see what had stopped their pursuit. The small stream they had crossed a few days ago on a different outing had swollen quite a bit in the constant raining they had experienced over the past few days. What they'd been able to cross so easily before would have swept their truck away now. They'd have to find an area of the river where the water wasn't as deep, which, like Dave said, would be easier during the day, when it stopped raining.

With some difficulty, Dave turned the truck around and headed back to the cabin. Rick sat sulking in the front seat as the forest rush past the window. Daniel could almost imagine that the storm raging around them was raining solely on him.

Then, without warning, Rick jumped up and said, "Don't you dare think we're givin' up! 'Cause we're not, We're heading out first thing tomorrow after those bears!" Rick glared at Tex, and Daniel understood why Rick wanted to catch the four bears so badly; it was the tie breaker. Rick wanted to get even with Tex for the dispute about the grizzly before. Well, they can have their contest, Daniel thought as Tex and Rick stared each other down, as long as I can have my fun, too.




Daniel wished more than anything that he didn't get car-sick so easily. As the truck bumped along through the mountain, Daniel lean back in his seat, utterly miserable. None of the others noticed, they were too, busy staring intently into the trees ahead of them, searching for the bears. Daniel stared out the window and remembered how he'd gotten into this.

Rick had been true to his word, waking everyone up as soon as the sun had begun to light the sky. The truck had been loaded up with provisions and they'd set off. It hadn't been long before Dave had found a way across the new river and they'd picked up the bears' trail once again. Everyone had been excite to get going. That was a few days ago.

Now, Daniel wasn't sure that they'd ever find the four bears they'd been tracking. At that moment, Dave brought the truck to a slow stop at the edge of the forest. Daniel pulled himself up, trying to see what his comrades had already found.

"What is it? What are we looking for?"

"Bears," Rick pointed. Where the trees ended, a huge, craggy slope began, and near the top, three figures were hunched against the rock.

"There're three," Tex said.

"What?" Rick stared in confusion. Dave pulled the truck a bit closer to the treeline.

"There're three bears. We tracked four. So where's the fourth one?" Dave pulled the truck a little bit closer, then drove through the trees right up to the bottom of the slope. A falcon swooped down from nowhere and seemed to dive bomb the bears creating a diversion. Then, just as Dave turned off the truck and turned to say they should be getting out of the truck now, the missing bear appeared and, together, all four bears dashed up the slope.

"They're makin' a break for it!" Tex yelled. Dave slammed his door back shut, and frantically scrambled to get the truck started again. The bears had almost reached the top of the slope when the truck roared back to life and Dave hit the gas. The truck started up the slope, sliding back down every so often.

The bears had reached the top now, but Daniel realized that they were trapped. The slope lead up to a stretch of level ground that lead from a sheer rock wall. The only escape route was cut off by a huge break in the rock, too wide to jump across, worn away by a waterfall. But the truck kept sliding back on the loose rocks on the slope making progress slow.

"C'mon! Go faster!" Rick had to shout over the noise the truck made.

"I'm going as fast as I can!" Dave twisted the wheel, trying to pull the truck onto firmer ground.

"The bears're trapped anyway! We'll catch'em in no time!" even Tex, who was already loud, had to shout to be heard. Daniel watched as the bears stood at the base of the wall, looking frantically left and right for any means of escape. The hunters were already more than halfway up the slope; things were looking good for them.

Two of the bears, a small black bear and a brown bear, broke away from the group and ran to the waterfall. The black bear crawled on top of the brown bear and used it to reach a bush near the waterfall. Then, the black bear jumped into the raging water. For a second, Daniel stared in shock. The was no way the little bear could jump that far. Then, he saw it. The bear had found a rock jutting from the cliff and had jump onto it. From there, it leaped into a tree growing from the cliff side. It was crossing the waterfall.

"Hurry up! They're going across the waterfall!"

"What!?" Rick couldn't believe it.

"Forget this! Ah'm goin' on foot!" Tex open the door and jumped out of the car. He managed to land on his feet and ran up the slope towards the bears, now rapidly advancing across the waterfall. Unfortunately, Tex wasn't making much better progress than the truck, and all four hunters ended up reaching the top of the slope at the same time. Daniel jumped out of the truck, running to the edge of the waterfall just in time to see the last bear disappear around the corner.

"Stupid TRUCK!" Tex kicked the truck in frustration. Dave, still in the driver's seat, groaned and banged his head on the wheel, setting off the horn.

"If we go down and around, we can still catch them," Rick said, "Let's go."




"I am really getting sick of all this rain," Rick snapped as the truck slid down the muddy slope once again. Daniel couldn't help feeling a bit of deja vu. The day was ending just like it had begun, with the four hunters struggling up a slope after the bears. But this time we'll catch them, thought Daniel. Finally, the truck reach the top of the slope. Daniel looked down and saw with horror that that it gave way to an even steeper slope on the other side.

"Hold on!" Dave screamed. The truck stood, frozen at the top of the slope, then slowly began to tip forward. The truck then gave up on tipping and just fell forward, sliding down the slope at an alarming speed to the whooping delight of Rick and Tex. Soon, Rick spotted the bears running for the trees. He leaned out the window, took aim, and fired at the largest of the bears; a white bear.

Daniel and Tex followed suit. They open the roof of the truck and shot over the heads of Dave and Rick. Dave stopped the truck, jumped out and set of after the bears, Rick and Tex right behind him. Daniel stopped for a moment to recover from the ride. Looking up he saw one of the bears, a brown one, heading for a valley, strait toward Dave. Daniel though fast. If he tried to shoot from here, he'd miss without a doubt, but if he tried to run to the bear, it'd catch Dave before he'd had a chance to shoot.

Daniel looked to the truck to find it was still on and the keys were in the ignition. He ran to the driver's side of the truck and started the car forward. It was a race between him and the bear now. Dave ran into the valley, oblivious to the bear on his tail. Daniel cranked the wheel, spinning the truck around, blocking the bear's path while shining the truck's headlights in the its eyes. Daniel raised his gun and fired.

The shot missed, leaving the bear unharmed as it turned and ran back the way it had come. Daniel leaped out of the truck, grabbing a wire net as he went, and raced after it, into a stretch of long marshy grass. He'd completely lost sight of the bear, but as he wadded through a sea of reeds and tall grass, Daniel found tufts of brown fur here and there. A loud snap and the smell of garlic drifted from an area in the weeds a yard or two ahead. Daniel crept forward.

The grass rustled directly in front of Daniel, and the bear sat up right in front of him. Daniel threw the net over the beast as it turned and spotted him. The bear tried to run, but its paws became tangled in the net. It fell to the ground, struggling in the net, getting itself tangled worse the more it tried to free itself.

"Daniel!" Dave was calling his name. The glow of the truck's headlights blinded him for a second before the truck turned its side to him.

"Hey, guys! I caught one!" Daniel yelled back, "Bring a rope."

One of the car doors opened, and Tex ran out, a length of wire slung across his shoulder. Together, Daniel and Tex tied the brown bear's paws together, tying its jaws shut as well. They had to get Rick to help them drag the bear back to the truck, the way it was struggling and its sheer weight. It took the combined efforts of all four men to get the bear into the trunk of the car.

"Let go home." said Daniel, triumphantly, once they were back in the truck. The sooner they were back in the cabin instead of driving for days on end, the better. Rick pulled a pack of beer out from under one of the seats; they were going to celebrate now. For once, Daniel enjoy the car ride through the mountain. The only downside was the way the truck slid on the mud every time they went around a curve, causing Tex and Rick to erupt in whoops and shouts, and Daniel to experience a wave of nausea.

As the truck went around one final bend, Rick and Tex's whoops turned to cries of fear as the car slammed into the cliff, skidded to the edge of the road and leaned dangerously to one side, before plunging down the cliff. The truck rolled onto its side into a tree, bouncing off into another tree, while the men inside fought to hold on in a whirl of broken glass, and twisted metal. As the car bounced and crashed down the hill, it hit a rock and went spinning into the air before landing on its side with a final crash in the flooded river at the bottom. Daniel, who'd thrown his arms in front of his face, slowly drew them away and looked around.

Rick was flung halfway over the side of the front passenger seat and Tex was lying on the wall, which was probably the floor now halfway on top of Daniel. Everyone was scratched up and bloody. Everything seemed to be sideways to Daniel, and he realized that was because he was the only one still strapped to his seat, being the only one who had worn a seat belt.

Daniel unstrapped himself and got to his feet, pulling Tex up with him. Rick sat up from his awkward position, a dazed look on his face. He looked around, trying to take in his surroundings, crying out in alarm when he looked to the driver's seat. Daniel followed his gaze and nearly did the same. Dave, who had been on the side of the truck that had landed face up, was still strapped in his seat, causing him to hang limply, half propped up by the steering wheel. Rick slowly stood up and reach up to Dave. He felt for a pulse before turning to Daniel and Tex.

"He's dead." A chill went down Daniel's spine, starting at the base of his neck and ending at his feet. He expected the chill to fade, but it didn't. In fact, it began to creep back up his legs. Daniel looked down in alarm to find the truck was beginning to fill with water. He exchanged glances with Rick and Tex before scrambling up the seat and fumbling with the door.

"It's stuck," Daniel called over his shoulder. Suddenly, He was pushed aside by Tex, who somehow managed to force the entire door off of the car. Tex crawled out and lost his balance falling into the water below. Rick glanced one last time at the dead man above him before wading through water already waist-deep, into the back seat behind Daniel. Daniel climbed out the door and helped Rick out after him. Both men jumped into the rapidly rising river.

Rick managed to land in a shallower part of the river and swim to shore. Daniel hit the water and went completely under. He was swept into a fallen tree as he struggled to reach the surface. Daniel swam upward, through the dead branches and threw his arms over the dead tree, once he broke the surface, trying to pull himself up out of the water. Something jerked him backward; his leg had been trapped between the branches of the tree.

Daniel was trapped, blinded by the rain, and losing his grip fast. He desperately shouted for help, hoping that Rick or Tex would hear him. Through the gloom, Daniel saw a figure in the river, swimming toward him. Relieved, Daniel opened his mouth to tell his rescuer where he was, but all that came out of his mouth was a scream as the figure materialized into a bear.

It was the little black bear from the waterfall, swimming toward him determinedly. As it drew nearer, it dived below the water, out of sight. Daniel was frantically looking around to see where the bear re-surfaced, when he felt it brush against his trapped leg. Daniel screamed and thrashed, certain the bear was going to eat him, thoroughly surprised when one of the branches trapping his leg suddenly disappeared, setting him free.

Daniel took advantage of the fallen tree and used it to push himself upstream, away from the bear. He swam with all his might toward the riverbank where he spotted Tex and Rick in the mud. Rick sat up and started shouting and pointing toward the bear in the river, frantically searching the mud for his gun. Daniel felt the bottom of the river beneath his feet, finding that he'd made it to shallower waters. He waded to the bank where he collapsed beside Tex in the mud.

"Dangit! My gun was in the truck," Rick muttered as the black bear swam back to shore and ran into the trees.

"Guys?" Daniel asked.

"Huh?" Tex responded, out of breath.

"How 'bout we go home? I mean home, as in not in the mountains."

"Ah think tha's the greatest idear ah've ever heard."

"Well, it's gonna be a long walk back to the cabin," Tex said as he got up out of the mud and help Daniel up after.

"Then let's get goin'!" Rick called, already halfway to the tree line. Daniel and Tex looked back at the river. The truck was almost completely submerged now. Both men looked for a moment, then turned and ran to catch up with Rick to start a very long hike back home.